WOUNDED WARRIOR FAMILY SECRET

      When I was a child my father, in anger, would tell me, "I put a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food on the table! The reality is my father had to do that.  Failure to provide food, clothing and shelter for a child is considered child abuse.  I owed him nothing.  He was doing what he was supposed to do.  I did not choose to have children.  He did.  It is the immature and potentially abusive parent that has a need to receive credit for providing the bare legal minimum.
      This childhood situation is eerily familiar to another situation I have encountered in my travels as a comedian.  I have had the great fortune to travel across the nation and perform for many military members including many wounded warriors.  Following shows, I have spent much time in conversation with many wounded warriors, both married and divorced.  These discussions have led to an all too common revelation.  
     I have heard many wounded warriors painfully share experiences where their spouses have thrown taking care of them in their face.  That's right.  Some wounded warrior spouses have the audacity to attempt to control, through guilt and a sense of entitlement, the emotions and actions of their wounded warrior spouse.  
     I have heard story after story where a wife has repeatedly stated to a disabled wounded warrior, "You owe me for taking care of you during your recovery!"  I find this statement appalling not because they are speaking to a wounded warrior but because the wife expects to receive "extra credit" for performing her spousal duties. When you marry a military member this is the risk you take.  If you do not wish to take that risk then don't marry them.  Once you have crossed that marriage threshold you have taken on the responsibility of a military spouse.  It is your duty.
     Much like my father who desired credit for performing his fatherly duties, the wife is simply performing the duties of a military spouse.  Such a spouse does not have the right to verbally and emotionally abuse the injured military member.  Again, if you did not want to take on such responsibility then don't marry a military member.  
     I have heard stories of such disgusting spouses making statements such as, "This is not what I signed up for!"  Are they under the assumption their military spouse signed up for injury and/or disfigurement?  They did not but it is the risk they took when they joined the military.  It is the same risk the spouse took when they married the military member.  Such cruel spouses did not hesitate to cash the military pay and the associated extra pay for hazardous duty and combat pay.  They happily and quickly spent those benefits.
     The injury and subsequent disability of a military member is no different than the birth of a special needs child or the injury to an existing child.  Would any reasonably sane parent berate the special needs or injured child for the care which has to be provided and is to be expected?  It is the duty of the parent to provide for the needs of the child just as it is the duty of the spouse to provide for the wounded military spouse.  Such deplorable spouses have not earned the right to add insult to their spouse's injury.  
     If you do not want to provide care for your wounded warrior spouse then leave.  You have that right.  He is not a child.  He is an adult and can find other means.  Many such spouses stay because they do not wish to face the judgmental stares of family and friends yet have no problem with secretly torturing the wounded spouse both verbally and emotionally behind closed doors.
     For such abhorrent military spouses.... you have the right to leave... what you don't have the right to do is.... TORTURE AN INJURED MILITARY SPOUSE BECAUSE YOU DO NOT POSSES THEIR COURAGE AND DEDICATION!